Message From Bob
From Wazoo In Effigy
Message From Bob
After a run of pure character farce, Rose lets the joke turn into something you can actually believe in, and this is the album’s high-water mark. He has always found a lifetime in the ordinary, but here he goes further: he builds a whole theology out of an old friend’s rambling voicemails. Over a dry, syncopated Rhodes-and-bass vamp that never quite settles, at a steady clip in a bright major key, the deadpan spoken vocal delivers Bob’s misdialed apologies and glued-shut windows as if they were scripture, then the band snaps into a harmonized hook: “A message from Bob / is a message from God / if everything is one. / That’s not religion. / That’s arithmetic.” The joke keeps sharpening into something closer to a real argument, and the bridge’s inventory of red lights and falling ice cubes lands the thesis cold: “Meaning is everywhere / once you lower the standard.” A single telephone ring near the five-minute mark triggers a hard cut that’s the best-placed silence on the record since “You Don’t Say,” and the fuzz-guitar answers between verses keep the whole thing from tipping into pure sketch. It runs long, and the fourth verse leans more on concept than melody, but this is Rose at his most gleefully committed to a bit that turns out to mean it. Where the comedy stops being a costume and becomes a conviction. Play this one first.
Lyrics
Everything is one That includes this room That includes the telephone That includes Bob This is usually where people start objecting But you can't have everything be one and then make an exception for Bob
Hi Michael, this is Bob You probably already know that but just in case, it's Bob I can't remember if I sent you the thing that I was talking about But if you didn't get it, let me know and I'll try to figure out what it was and then I'll send it to you You're probably already asleep so don't worry It's not an emergency You can send it tomorrow Thus was the message given
A message from Bob is a message from God if everything is one That's not religion That's arithmetic
Oh, shit, Michael, sorry I guess I must have misdialed you I didn't mean to call you You don't have to call me back 'cause if it was something important I would have left you a message The message says there was no message Nevertheless there is a message
A message from Bob is a message from God if everything is one The message may specifically state that there is no message This does not invalidate the message
You have to learn how to read these things
That thing I told you I was going to buy Well, since I had one and sold it because I didn't like it I decided to go ahead and buy it in hopes that the new one is better I'll let you know if I don't He had the thing He rejected the thing He sold the thing He bought the thing Do not call this reincarnation We don't have enough information
A traffic light turns red Instruction The refrigerator starts at two thirteen Information Three pieces of ice fall into the tray Possibly a number The neighbor backs out comes back backs out again This may concern you A receipt blows against the garage door Fourteen seventy-two You can say these things are unrelated You can say that Meaning is everywhere once you lower the standard
Michael, this is Bob If you ever need to get in my house and you can't find the key and try opening the window it's not you It's me I glued them shut Just thought you should know
If all is one, Bob is one If Bob is one, Bob is all If Bob leaves a message all has left a message Therefore check your voicemail
A message from Bob is a message from God if everything is one And everything is one unless somebody has revised the policy
Sometimes the message is the object you bought after selling the same object because you didn't like it Sometimes the message is the window he glued shut on your behalf Sometimes the message is two thirteen Sometimes— That was a wrong number Or that was the message
Don't call him back If it was something important he would've left a message Just thought you should know